A report published yesterday on Chattahbox.com details the exploits of a particularly reprehensible Evangelical Christian, and raging homophobe named Mike Heath, whom has apparently made remarks involving some bad luck in Maine as being the fault of gay marriage. Sounds like Bill O’Reilly and Heath need to get a room.

Deciphering idiocy gives me a headache:

“Our crops are faring like our moods. The potato crop is blighted, and corn and fruit fields wither. In one historic building in Augusta, rain flooded the basement, as water from another source poured down through the ceiling and extinguished a century-old chandelier.

Few people would be bold enough to suggest the cause of the endless rain and gloom, that the moral climate in Maine has caused the sun to hide its face in shame.

Worse than the rain is the fact, that Maine voted in homosexual “marriage.”

In May, our elected officials overturned a law of nature, and in its place paid honor to evil and unnatural practices.

Our leaders allowed a cloud of error to hide the light of reason, and then the rain began. How fitting that this eclipse of human reason is mirrored by the disappearance of the sun!

What darkness equals the error of saying a family should be headed by two mothers or two fathers? What error equals saying that two women can be married, or two men?

I am not saying that homosexuals or the gay rights movement are to blame for the weather. Far from it!

The fault lies with a refractory governor and Legislature who imposed an immoral law on our people.”

In Heath’s worldview, once the government allowed “evil and unnatural practices” to take place in Maine, “the rain began.” Who knew that gay marriage could cause biblical floods and pestilence in the form of potato blight and plunge the state into darkness!

I have just been notified that Mike Heath has been awarded Just Out’s first ever D-Bag of the Week Award! Congratulations, Mike Heath of Maine! You’re the biggest D-Bag we’ve come across, or will come across this week! Cross your fingers for next!