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The Lady has released her new video “Teeth,” and it is not any sort of exaggeration to say that it is the most breathtakingly, overwhelmingly gay thing in the universe.
The video, featuring S&M vampires shaking their hips and sensually threatening each other with whips in some sort of Catholic-damaged ultramodern batchelor pad-slash-dungeon of pleasure, must be seen to be believed.
Literally, Lady Gaga could take Liberace, Mr. Humphries, the entire cast of A Chorus Line, Liza Minelli, Bobby Trendy, and Darcelle herself, make them all get full-body waxes and mani-pedis, outfit them in Bob Mackie gowns and mirabou boas, and put them on an Atlantis cruise aimed straight at Puerto Vallarta – and the sum total would not be as gay as the video for “Teeth.”
What do you think, readers? Did it make you feel straight in comparison, too?
UPDATE: This video is promotional, but according to director Sergio Ceron is Gaga-funded and approved. Doesn’t that make you think of a political ad? “I’m Lady Gaga, and I approve of this incredible display of gayness.” She’d then touch the director on each shoulder with her Disco Stick, and he would henceforth be known as Sir Sergio Ceron of the Haus of Gaga. Something like that, at least.
7 responses so far ↓
1 Erik // Jan 29, 2010 at 9:15 am
I’m going to used the same words you used: The Lady Gaga new video “Teeth,” and it is not any sort of exaggeration to say that it is the most breathtakingly, overwhelmingly STUPID thing in the universe. What’s the message of the video exactly? I think this is garbage and not even arty. And she could have at least used a hot guy! Once again, Gay men are portrayed as sexual deviants, queeny trash and stereotyped…What a progress!! And if some Gay men find this video “amazing”, then Gay men are really superficial and dumb, and I don’t belong to their category anymore…
Sorry Gaga, no offense, but your video is irresponsible and laughable, not to simply say witless, unsexy, offending and not even a pleasure for the eyes…nor ears!!
2 harley // Jan 29, 2010 at 10:08 am
sorry charlie. this shit is fanmade. they did a pretty decent job, but gaga has nothing to do with it. she’s filming the telephone video with beyonce, touring nonstop and getting ready for the grammys.
3 will // Feb 22, 2010 at 8:58 am
harleys right, she didnt make it!!!!!
its off youtube and some fans made it and its actully called “teeth, the gay version”
4 Stephen // Mar 15, 2010 at 11:17 pm
Sorry Will, You are mistaken. The “male versions” are just male vocalists singing her song. The “Teeth” video has two half naked guys, one tied to a chair, the other dancing around, trying to get the other to “show me your teeth” It’s very vampire / BDSM / homo -erotic.
5 Chris // Apr 14, 2010 at 8:53 pm
First of all, the two guys used are smoking hot. Wow. Especially the dom.
Second of all, Will, I think you’re missing the point of the video– a concept which accounts for much of Gaga’s persona, and, in my opinion, much of which makes queer aesthetics great: subversion. The video is subversive in every sense of the word. The most obvious way is in its homosexuality, which Nick touched on, but by portraying a dark fantasy, I think the video attempts to discuss and even, if possible, normalize sexual exploration, and thereby undermines our preconceived notions of sexuality, which will only ossify if not occasionally provoked. The words you used to deprecate the video are problematic: ’sexual deviant’, ‘queeny trash’. The minute the queer community stops pushing the boundaries of gender performance and sexual normativity is the day it starts becoming way too boring for my tastes. If you want to assimilate, that’s fine for you, but remember that by attempting to force sexual normalcy (if that’s something queers can ever genuinely hope to achieve) on everyone else, you’re marginalizing the people who need you most; the trannies, the leatherdaddies and fags who the rest of society has deemed ’sexual deviants’ and ‘queeny trash’. The movie fabulous and provocative; it’s GaGa gold.
And let me reiterate, those guys are smoking hot. Always a good thing.
6 Emily // Jun 17, 2010 at 11:04 am
Nick, some gays will like this, some won’t. Just like the rest of the world. You shouldn’t insult people just for liking something you dislike. It’s called OPINION. I like it
(I’m a bisexual girl btw, not sure if that matters…)
7 Tyler // Aug 13, 2010 at 4:20 pm
Lame. Lame. Lame. Guess she has has to keep the gays happy because eventually they will walk away the way do with everything else.
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